Vocal Mama

Having a positive outlook in life is crucial. Stress and negativity does more harm to us than we can ever imagine. I was under a lot of stress since my papa passed away. I even had anxiety attacks a couple of times. Things just did not make sense. I was always blaming myself or someone else for the situation I was in. The world seemed pale. I always felt either sad or mad and dragged myself to function every day activities. Some days were better than others but most were cruel. I have hardly ever been this anxious and stressed earlier in my life so I did not have an idea how it feels but now I somewhat know how it does. It feels like as if you are caged in our own thoughts, you try but you can’t get out of what your mind is consistently thinking. We, as a society, don’t take mental health seriously but our body actually cannot differentiate between mental and physical trauma. I struggled but eventually took over my anxiety issues and the following things helped me the most: Talk, talk,...

Yuvaan recently fell sick. He had fever on and off for five days. One minute he was fine and next minute he was warm, vomiting, irritated, and crying. The five days of fever were like a nightmare for us. He was just not taking his medications, was drowsy plus super clingy. His nose was blocked and he was coughing. None of us (Y, S, and I) slept properly for 4 nights. But this time rather than focusing on what happened and how it happened, I would share what helped me get pass it. Here is a list: ➡️ Have patience and a lot of it. ➡️ Consult the pediatrician ASAP and abide by what he/she suggests. Do not just do not start your gharelu ilaj and delay the doctor visit. ➡️ The baby will be clingy and cranky so put everything aside and focus on the baby.   Every other thing can wait. Cradle him, comfort hi m, hug him. ➡️ Babies hate medicines. They will sometimes throw up immediately after the dose. So, use a dropper or medicine dispenser to give medicine. Dispense the medicine at the en...

I lost my father four months ago. I was emotionally very close to him. He was a very calm parent. He rarely shouted at me. He always had solutions to my problems and answers to my queries. He always told me that no question is silly and it's okay to speak up my mind. There has not been a single day after his demise when I have not thought about him. I am a single child  but I never felt alone while growing up because I always had papa to play with me. I have a lot of wonderful memories with him and the event cited below is one of my favorite.  I must have been 4-5 years old. We used to live in a nuclear set up. It was just me and my mumma-papa. My papa used to walk me to school and back to home, every day. On our way back, I used to walk-dance and he used to buy me an ice cream. We had a black and white videocon TV at home and I loved watching it after coming back from school. One day, I saw an advertisement of a pepsodent's brush which had feet attached to it. The adverisemen...

It was the day before janamasthami; the birthday of lord Krishna, and inspite of the rains we went out to get the Krishna-attire for Yuvi. It has been a ritual since Y was born; to dress him up as lord Krishna on janamasthami every year. The first two times were easy. We dressed him up and clicked beautiful photos. This was his third janamasthami. After juggling through clothes from shop to shop, we brought home a beautiful orange dress. Y liked it too and kept calling it 'sundar'. Next day, in the evening, out of zest I got all dressed up and then started to dress up Y. Y said "no-no-no" and denied to wear the dress. We tried to lure him with different stuff but he stood up on his grounds. After a lot of hussle, we gave up. Y was so frustrated at our behaviour that he even refused to wear his night suit. We then took him to his almirah and let him choose a t-shirt to wear. Y has always loved footballs so he chose a t-shirt with a print of football on it. Anyway, the ...

I don't know the feeling of having a sibling since I am an only child. I was emotionally close to my parents so I never felt alone as such; except on raksha bandhans each year. I was so insecure about being an only child that I even used to lie about it. But then with time, I accepted it. I am now married with a kid but every year Raksha bandhan comes and makes me feel sad. Not that  I don't have cousins; I do have plenty of them and they are quite loving but most of them have their own sisters and are not obligated to treat me like one. At few raksha bandhans when I was newly married and excited about every festival, I used to joyfully call my cousins and invite them over to my place for Rakhi. But then after doing this a couple of times, I started expecting them to do stuff for me and well that did not go well. If you don't have a sibling or a close cousin who does not have a sibling too, Rakhi is mostly a festival of expectations for you.  My husband has a sister and she...

The other day we took our 2 year old (referred as Y, hereafter) to the society park for outdoor play. He was enjoying himself until an unknown 1.5 year old came and hugged him out of the blue. Y got intimidated by this overwhelming gesture and pulled the li'l boy away but the li'l boy did not give up and the event ended up with Y crying out loud. My mother was looking at all this drama as she had accompanied us to the park. When Y started crying, she said, "arre, why are u scared of such a small baby. He is just hugging you. Come on, don't be so shy". Just so that you know, Y is usually very clingy. He hugs and kisses us all the time. Now, I am not a parenting expert and I love and respect my mother a lot but my child is not someone to be judged. He must have the freedom to express. If he was intimidated by that hug, he had right to oppose and react in whatever way he wanted to. Y is 2 years old, thats how the 2 year olds are. Y is learning to handle and express h...

Disclaimer: this post is about my papa's death and how I dealt-dealing with it. I have only written it because writing helps me feel better, I feel relieved when I write my thoughts. Also, I want to remember all of this and hence, I have posted it here. This is also my way to thank my friends-family who have stood by us during these tough times. You really don't need to read further if you are faint hearted.  Dealing with Loss Never imagined that I would ever go through this. One night I got a call from my papa's closest friend. He was crying on the other end. He said papa was unwell and I must leave for the hometown immediately. I could feel my heart pounding at that moment. I knew that my beloved father was no more. I did not cry though, all I kept thinking was about my mother. How helpless she must have been feeling at that moment. Being an only child and living 400 kms far away from them made all of this worst. I gathered all my courage and left in the midnight to see m...