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Parenting a Threenager

I am not a very patient person. I have a short temper, but most people don’t know that because I can act/tame myself down in public. My son was a very calm baby. He was very easy to handle until around 2.5 years of age. His early years of life were spent in house because of Covid and only when he started school, he got introduced to the outside world. I started seeing change in his personality once he had started school, but I never expected such a huge flip around 3 years of age.

He turned 3 in June and the calm in him got totally replaced by chaos. His verbal skills are multiplying every day, his emotions are always on a turmoil, and he pretty much understands how he can express himself. Forget expressing, I can see that he can now literally manipulate us in agreeing whatever he wants to do.

Yesterday, I wanted to go down to take a walk after dinner. I asked Y if he would like to accompany. He said yes but he insisted that he would like to cycle and not walk. I was in no mood of running behind him since his cycling skills are out of the world. He cycles in full speed while looking anywhere but in-front. I tried to convince him for a walk but of course he manipulated me to take him down cycling. I did not want to bang my head to the wall anymore and so I agreed. We came down and he started cycling, all the time I had to run behind him so that he does not bang into the elderlies or other kids. He cycled for 45 minutes before I could manage to get him to the lift lobby to go back home. While we were in the lift lobby, he started throwing a fit about not going back home. He wanted to cycle more but well, I clearly wanted to get back home. I was so tired of his shit that I snapped at him. There were a couple of fellow moms waiting in the lift lobby; they gave me a judgmental stare and advise to calm down. I did not care. I got Y home and put him to sleep.

This is basically our every other day’s story. This three going thirteen phase is taking a toll on our peace of mind. Things get out of hand many times but once we see Y smiling or saying things like, “Yuvi sad ho gaya” we just melt and shower him with hugs and kisses. One thing that I have learnt from this experience is to never judge a parent. You have no idea what they are going through. Wish they had taught us something about parenting in school or college. We are appearing in parenting exams one after the other and the syllabus keep changing so we have no idea what the questions will be like. Anyway, one day at a time helps. Taking some time out helps. Keeping him in a routine helps. Reminding ourselves that he is just a kid, and this is just a phase helps. And when nothing helps, Yuvi’s smile, hugs, and kisses work like magic.


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